Empire of Dougtopia

The (first) Empire of Dougtopia is the European branch of the Rig Lord Order in their attempt to conquer Europe. Their mortal enemy is the Empire of Chatistan, which ended up defeating Dougtopia and taking over Europe themselves.

Description
The Empire of Dougtopia began in Germany where they developed many different kinds of delicious beer, and its population (including its army) is incredibly drunk at all times. The Emperor also has access to a list of European leaders that he acquired from the Irish president. The Empire is unstable and sometimes breaks out into civil war. Their scientists developed the seemingly powerful Battle Bears, but all of the bears were killed during the civil war between the Dougtopian states of Germany and Switzerland.

The Dougtopian army often paints the wrong horse with armor, presumably as a result of them being drunk all the time.

History
In the year 1000, the Dougtopian empire began in Germany. They immediately attempted to invade Switzerland with their army of 10,000 swordsmen, but are defeated by the Swiss army.

Dougtopia then proposed an alliance treaty to Luxembourg in the hopes that they would join the Empire, but Luxembourg instead met Dougtopia's Emperor with a vast army prepared for war. The Dougtopian Emperor managed to escape safely.

The Emperor then attempted to peacefully ally with Switzerland, but they simply replied, "No thanks."

He later returned to Switzerland to attempt to ally with them again, this time offering a diverse selection of German beer. However, the king of Switzerland pointed out that Dougtopia had already tried to take the country by force beforehand and didn't trust them. In response, the Emperor encouraged him to try the beer anyway, and it ended up changing his mind, causing Switzerland to ally with Dougtopia and join the empire.

Dougtopia then set their sights back on Luxembourg. Their revitalized army got extremely drunk off of German beer and attacked Luxembourg. The battle lasted several hours before both armies were tired and called for a truce. The leaders grew close to an alliance treaty, but the King of Luxembourg suddenly changed his mind and ran out of his palace, telling his army that he was tricked and calling for them to "finish" the Dougtopians. The Dougtopians slowly retreated back to Germany.

In response to Chatistan's creation of Horse Cannons, the Dougtopians decided they needed an animal-based weapon of their own: the Battle Bears. These were bears raised and trained specifically for war, with special armor created by the Dougtopians. It was then that a civil war broke out within Dougtopia between Switzerland and Germany (because all of them were still drunk), in which all of the Battle Bears were killed.

Chatistan took the opportunity that a fractured Dougtopia offered to attempt to invade Germany, but they were somehow still able to overpower Chatistan's Girlboss Warriors and Horse Cannons to drive them out.

Dougtopia then attempted to ally with Belgium by offering the Dougtopian Princess, who was already in an incestuous relationship with her father, in marriage to the King of Belgium. Somehow this worked and Belgium joined the Empire. Also, the Princess told an incredible joke, that being "What do you call a German princess with three eyes? A triple!"

The top chefs of Dougtopia then tried to research the special meal known as fish and chips to offer it to England in an attempt to ally, but this was actually ignored by the leadership of both countries, as the Dougtopian Emperor decided to simply offer the Queen of England beer instead. She enjoyed the beer and wanted to share it with her subjects, but before they could sign an alliance treaty, Chatistan took over the country with brute force, decimating the city of London and slaughtering the Queen.

The Dougtopian Emperor then sailed to Ireland to negotiate an alliance with the President of Ireland. After an intense and nearly violent altercation, Ireland agreed to join the Empire, and the Dougtopian Emperor left with an extremely important list of all of the European leaders, intending to kill them all.

The Dougtopian Emperor returned to his empire to find out that Chatistan had successfully invaded Germany and taken it over, leaving his empire split between Belgium, Switzerland, and Ireland.

He took his remaining Belgian soldiers and decided to march into Chatistan-controlled Luxembourg. The soldiers easily took over most of the capital until they encountered Chatistan's God Emperor in the middle of the city. Terrified, the Emperor ordered his army to shoot at the giant Emperor, but the Emperor annihilated the entire army using his Dragon Breath and flew off to Hell.

Defeated, the Emperor ventured to the Netherlands to offer the Dutch Chieftan his list of European leaders in exchange for an alliance. The Dutch Chieftan refuses his offer, because he's gay and "(doesn't) want to marry anyone."

Chatistan soon conquered the rest of Europe, including what remained of Dougtopia, through their alliance with Hell and Satan. The leaders of Dougtopia fled to Ohio, where they founded the Empire of Dougkota.